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Home schools haven’t always been subject to controversy. The faces of George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, Agatha Christie, Charles Dickens, and John Philip Sousa would adorn the Home Schooling Hall of Fame, if one existed. In their time, “socialization” wasn’t an issue. Unfortunately, in education today the focus has shifted to socialization over academics!  

Though their children may excel academically, home schooling parents face accusations of stunting their children’s social development through isolation. However, nothing could be further off-base. Evidence suggests that home schooled children have greater social confidence than their public school counterparts. After all, socializing is NOT what children are in school for! Just ask my son’s K-4 teacher (his only public school experience); she told me that my gregarious little fellow was “too” sociable. A teacher punished a friend’s talkative 3rd grader for talking in class; she made him walk the perimeter of the playground alone during recess, the only time when children are normally allowed to talk to each other! Home schooled children talk to their mothers, their siblings, the neighbors, store clerks, librarians, and other children at the park, all without fear of punishment! 

Most home schooling parents, keenly aware that they alone are responsible for their children’s development, go the extra mile to enrich their children’s social lives. 

Donna Yancey kept school work to the mornings. The afternoon options for her daughter were mind-boggling. She tackled swimming, tennis, volleyball, basketball, gymnastics, drama, and ice skating. In addition, she sang in church, contributed to a home schooling newsletter, and experienced culture at a performing arts center, where home schoolers can attend performances alongside public school kids. Then there were field trips and also family activities. Mrs. Yancey wryly said that they had considered softball, but decided the social calendar was full. 

“You don’t have to worry about socializing,” Lissa Sawicki affirmed, “You have to worry about mileage and gas!” Mrs. Sawicki home schooled her pre-teen daughters, who were involved in Bible clubs and studies, volunteer work, piano, softball, soccer, basketball, and a pony club. 

As home schooling continues to grow in popularity, more and more opportunities are created for home schooled students. There are co-ops for group learning, specific interest clubs, workshops and even classes like pottery, physical education, and dance. My own children have enjoyed (although not all at once!) soccer, basketball, ballet, gymnastics, swimming, roller skating, ice skating, home school choir, piano lessons, recitals at the local nursing home, and 4-H clubs, where both are officers this year. Most of those activities have been specifically for home schoolers, except for soccer and basketball, which were church-related. However, there are home school sports teams available for when they become teenagers! 

Their own exposure to public or private schools leads some home schoolers to develop strong opinions about the socialization issue. Lissa Sawicki says that when people insist that schools are essential for socialization, they are misguided. What schools tend to do is introduce everybody’s standards to your kids. Above all else, your own standards are most important for your family. Since God created the family as a social unit, parents are ultimately responsible to the Lord for the training of their children. 

Socialization, in case you didn’t know, is not a synonym for socializing. Socializing is what kids do on the jungle gym and what co-workers do around the coffee maker: it’s just making conversation in a group. I much prefer my child to learn godly behavior and beliefs from an adult with a Christian world view (that would be me) rather than to learn about what passes for “standard” these days from a pack of Britney Spears imitators. That kind of “socialization” we can do without! 

With a little effort, every home schooled child can be involved in as many activities as the parent can stand. Many are low-cost; some are even no-cost, such as “park days,” when home schoolers schedule a regular time to meet at a playground. Thoughtful conversations with family members will go a long way in training a child in the art of conversation as well, and that activity is priceless.

Copyright 2003 by Brenda B. Covert